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Unencrypting Rifted Entities
as Channelled by St. WhY

The answer to the M/K conundrum is this: they aren't what they seem. Our dear ArchTangent, Abe Lincoln, is assisting another being (for reasons I cannot yet divulge) in giving the illusion that M & K are different people. They are actually a sort of doppelbanger, composed of Uncle Abe and another entity I shall designate "entity MK". While "entity MK" is hanging out with you in one character, Abe covers the role of the other one who is making a fleeting appearance at the wrong door or the other side of the crowd. Since Abe is busy selling sleeping pills these days, he can only spare the time for passing cameo appearances -- which is about all he's ever done anyway. (*shrug* -- no bad on ya, ArchTangent Abe -- you do what you do the way you do it, after all.)

Anyway, if you wish to learn the secrets of "entity MK", I give you a brand-spankin'-- (or, branding, after spanking --) new textuo-gibberomantic spell (which, of course, can also be adapted easily to the elucidation of ANY Street's doppelbanger problems):

Take the names of all involved, print them in a garish cartoon-witchy font (or, optionally, in that old-west advertising one) on a sheet of European A-4 paper (NOT the closest American equivalent, as it will NOT work, although you ARE allowed to obtain it locally -- preferably a nice enviro-friendly brand, of course), then cut out each individual letter, and place them in a small, lidded, jar. Seal it carefully with earwax. (It does not matter who or what the earwax comes from, but no other kind of wax will do.) Wait no less than 1,380 minutes. (Do not convert that to hours for convenience. Count each minute as it passes.) Then, under the light of the worst flickering half-burnt fluorescent fixture you can find, open the jar, swallow all the letters, then sniff the earwax (and use a finger if needed) until you regurgitate them. Be quick! You do not want to blur the ink too badly with tummy juices. Don't waste time trying to get the last few up if they are stubborn; you won't need all of them back in order to get the message. (BTW, you can use the finger for other things too, if you want. Maybe pack some pepper juice for the pilgrimage to the Place of Bad Fluorescent Light. :) IF you follow these instructions to the letter (or, rather, for the letters), you will gain an entire new dimension of knowledge regarding "entity MK" and its identity and motives.

Yours in the Jellyfish,
St. whY, HRI-OBLotJ,FCoC and
MegaloHypoManiacal Verbomantic Shortbus-Specialist Ultraordinaire

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